I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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