I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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