she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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