We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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