This is the prime rib incident all over again
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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