its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
she smelled like a LAN party
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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