I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
