its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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