so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize