i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
