Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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