Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She announced her abortion via fbk
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize