He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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