She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Randomize
