Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
