hell yes lets make some ravioli
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
