I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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