My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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