Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
