apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Sober January is a disaster.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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