She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
