Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
