dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
