I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
