he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
