I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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