My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
