jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I deserve this hangover.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize