READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
