There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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