i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Randomize
