Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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