i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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