It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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