You made me cry and you don't even care
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
