He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
