so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
My vagina is officially offended.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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