oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
