So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Randomize
