She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
