I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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