Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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