And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
