Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
