He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
