so that wasnt chicken after all
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
