He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
