ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
