Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
