shes about as inviting as chlamydia
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
