Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
